


everything

by laconicGhost



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Vent Writing, bad familial relationships ?? i guess, idk its just tooru's dad, nothing is described explicitly but still they have sex, something i wrote to get some bad things out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-26 10:41:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6235471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laconicGhost/pseuds/laconicGhost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The statement is only three words, but a part of Tooru already feels like that’s three words too many. The part of him that doesn’t want to rely on others: the one that Tooru has spent so many years trying to fight against and overcome. For a while, he was winning, but tonight the battle was too much by himself.</p>
<p>He needed someone else.</p>
<p>The reply is instantaneous.</p>
            </blockquote>





	everything

**Author's Note:**

> just a piece of vent writing i did the other night to cope with some bad feelings i needed to get out

It wasn’t often that Tooru found himself alone in his room, shoulders shaking and lungs desperately clawing for breaths that were too short. He had barely enough time to run in and shut his door before the searing tears started running down his cheeks and the ugly choked sobs he had been holding in all afternoon escaped his throat before he could hold them back. He didn’t usually break down like this -- he could usually keep everything locked away and he could keep the tears at bay for as long as he needed to.

However, tonight that pillar that he used to keep things standing had crumbled. An emotional ton had been thrust on his shoulders -- and he was being crushed by it.

He tells himself to stop, to pull himself together, because there was no need to act like this all over something so stupid, but he can’t think with all the thoughts from drilling themselves in his head: dark ones that he thought only came at night when he was alone and defenseless that shook his foundations and tore him down. He can hear the words his father had said now, ringing painfully in his ears and they bring more tears to his eyes.

_ Get over it. _

He wants to laugh, but it only makes him sob harder. 

If only he knew.  _ God,  _ if only he knew.

Tooru’s phone vibrates endlessly in his pocket. He ignores it. He doesn’t want to look at the endless stream of messages that he knew would be coming in from Mattsun and Makki and Iwa-chan, wondering if he was alright and checking in on him. He didn’t need to worry them with his self-deprecating and dark thoughts. And yet, as he stares at the phone when he pulls it out of his pocket and into his hand, there’s no one else he’d rather be talking to right now; no other person in the world that he’d rather see when he was feeling like this.

He moves sluggishly, his body already exhausted from weeping even though the tears keep coming, and unlocks his smartphone. He opens up the contact with trembling fingers, churning out a slow text that seems like it takes forever to type out, the synthetic clicks of the keyboard almost deafening him and driving a dark nail deep in his heart that whispers the words “ _you’re_ _weak by yourself”_. His vision swimming with tears that refuse to stop falling, he doesn’t even read it again before he brushes his thumb across the button that reads _Send._

 

_ i need you _

 

The statement is only three words, but a part of Tooru already feels like that’s three words too many. The part of him that doesn’t want to rely on others: the one that Tooru has spent so many years trying to fight against and overcome. For a while, he was winning, but tonight the battle was too much by himself.

He needed someone else.

The reply is instantaneous. A simple four words to Tooru’s three. Four words that make Tooru feel a million things at once: things that make him relieved and things that make him hurt for the wrong reasons when those insecurities rise back up to claw at him -- he’s not sure which one feels more intense.

 

_ i’m on my way _

 

It feels like hours, Tooru waiting alone on his bed, his tears finally slowing down until they become little sniffles, his eyes burning when he slides his eyes closed to nap. He feels completely wiped out from crying so hard for so long, but he doesn’t sleep. Horrible, black thoughts plague him, but he’s not left alone for long. Suddenly Iwa-chan’s presence is there overtop of him, cloaking him in a comforting warmth, pressing a slow kiss to his temple. He doesn’t ask what’s wrong, he just lets Tooru wrap his arms around his neck and whisper into his ear. 

Tooru’s thoughts slowly melt away with each kiss that’s pressed into his jaw, blackness retreating with every time Iwa-chan’s fingers drag across his skin -- digging in harder, touches growing hotter. Sighs turn to gasps, lips part to allow teeth down along tender flesh, and Tooru feels his raw throat slowly hurt less and less as he swallows every  _ I love you  _ that passes from Iwa-chan’s pink, kiss swollen lips, calloused hands dragging down his hips and thighs as clothing is shed layer after layer. Gasps turn to moans, Iwa-chan’s mouth travelling downward further and further until Tooru is suddering, toes curling, and his fingers are knotted though short, coarse hair.  _ Iwa-chan  _ melts away from his tongue and becomes  _ Hajime, Hajime, Hajime --  _ and then Tooru no longer feels connected to his body, stars behind his eyelids, the only thing rooting him to Earth those three simple words that Hajime keeps repeating over and over into the skin at the crook of his hip.

_ I love you, I love you, I love you. _

And in that single moment, Hajime becomes Tooru’s  _ everything _ .


End file.
